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Monday, August 30, 2010

The Modern Bathroom

We now have seats for our bowel movements. They are usually sparkling white, like this one:

As far as I can tell, this has not been done for comic effect.

We have these, too:

Soft paper we use to wipe the excrement from us.

More curious still is the object to the left.  A waxy screen, placed over the rim of the toilet. This is to protect us from any stray bacteria left by earlier visitors. I use one every time.

A simple lightbulb no longer suffices. We now have mood lighting:

It lends the process an ambiance which would be absent otherwise. Often, speakers play adult contemporary music at a volume that is audible but unobtrusive.

Perhaps we have brought additional amenities into the modern bathroom, and perhaps they need electricity. This possibility, too, has been foreseen:

The need is met by an extra light socket.

The most unsavory moment of your day can now be savored.

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